Birth Noises

So, I was doing my bump photos and then we were moving and crap!  I missed a bunch of weeks and then crap! I was really busy moving into my parent’s place and setting up our room & the nursery and preparing to go out on maternity leave and crap! I stopped chronicling my pregnancy entirely.  Which, really, gives my children a much better picture of their mother than if I had stuck to it – I start things with the best intentions, then life gets busy and I drop it, then I go back to it like OOH SORRY THING I NEGLECTED, I PROMISE TO DO BETTER THIS TIME.  So, what I’m saying is, don’t put your money on me actually doing better this time.  I do, however, want to get out their birth story – it’s pretty boring, but still – I want to have a record!  And I have a new bump picture!  No, I’m not pregnant again!! (is that even possible??)  I had BB take a photo of me when we were on our way out the door to the hospital, so I would never forget how gigantic I was when these two tiny humans were inside me.  It just all seemed so normal (albeit INCREDIBLY uncomfortable and a little sci-fi-y, so I guess not normal at all?) at the time, but looking back on it now I’m like DAMN GIRL HOW’D YOU GET A BASKETBALL UNDER YOUR SKIN.


So, birth story.I had a scheduled c-section, so I’m not in labor in that picture or anything.  Their birthday was supposed to be June 25th, which was 38 weeks, but at my 35 week appointment my feet were hella swollen and my blood pressure was elevated and BASICALLY I had mild preeclampsia.  So they monitored me for another week and a half or so and recheduled me for 37 weeks, June 18.  The girls were born two hours late (I was supposed to go in to the OR at 3, so this picture was taken around 12:30, since you need to arrive 2 hours early to register or what have you.   I hadn’t eaten since like 5am I think?  Because they sedate you and you may aspirate food into your lungs and die and they try to avoid that shit.  Anyway, my doctor didn’t show up till like 4:30).  But it was fast – I walked into the OR at 4:43pm (I heard a nurse call it) and they gave me my epidural, which was PAINFUL, don’t let them tell you different, but the worst part was trying to round my back with this basketball stomach, so it took a while for them to get it in.  Also, I was terrified, because HELLO THATS MY SPINE PLEASE DON’T FUCK IT UP.

Rosy was born at 5:00pm on the dot.  She was 19” long and 5lbs13oz – which is a crazy good size for a twin.  I have a vague impression of seeing a red, screaming alien looking creature held up above the curtain and then she was wisked away to the nurses across the hall.  A minute later, at 5:01, Maddy was born – 19.5” and 5lbs11oz.  I didn’t get to see her before she was wisked away – the curtain was angled so that whole side of the room was blocked to me.  BB went across the hall with the girls while I was stitched back together.  The nurses yelled across the hall to me that the  girls were healthy and beautiful – and long! – which made me smile.  When I was finally wheeled into recovery – shaking harder than I ever had in my life because of the epidural – Maddy was under the warming lamps to bring up her body temperature and all I could see of her was her tiny little foot sticking out.  It was so long and thin.  Rosy was swaddled in a hospital blanket and Bryan was holding her.  He handed her over to me and I was able to hold her for the first time.

It was legitimately the greatest day of my life.  When they brought us up to our room where we’d be staying our familes came up to see us and meet the girls – my sister and parents, his sister and brother-in-law, my college roommate & her husband – it was the best kind of chaos for a few hours while everyone oohed and awwwed and cuddled my babies.  And I cuddled them and tried to learn to nurse them.  And when everyone else left and it was just my tiny little family left in the room, it was the most beautiful feeling in the world.  I’ve literally never been happier.  Even though I couldn’t feel the lower half of my body, and I was a complete physical wreck, that was the greatest night of my life.  Even if it is the sappiest thing I’ve ever said.




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